Updated Sunday, February 17, 2013 at 08:01 PM
Hard-pressed for tuition money? Not by a longshot.
Mason Kaluzniak gets his next semester for free at Brandon University in Manitoba after Gil Cheung — coach of the BU men's basketball team — swished a half-court shot in his stead as part of a halftime promotion at Bobcats games.
"I started laughing (when Kaluzniak chose Cheung)," Brandon SID Matt Packwood told Yahoo! Sports. "Gil was a shooter when he played 10 years ago, but he had the whole team to pick from. Gil walks out, takes off the suit jacket, says 'game time' and makes it."
• At Fark.com: "Manny Pacquiao KO'd by IRS, refuses to fight in U.S. because of new 40% tax rate."
• At TheOnion.com: "Michael Jordan celebrates 50th birthday with last people he hasn't completely alienated yet."
A 65-year-old Ohio State fan says she was pulled over by police in Tennessee who mistook the Buckeye stickers on her car for a marijuana leaf.
In other words, those cops couldn't tell a Woody Hayes from a woody stem.
No holds barred
Snippets from an HBO interview with ultimate fight star Ronda Rousey:
• On whether she likes hurting her opponent: "No, but it's a fight. We're not baking cakes for each other. You know, I didn't go in there to make a pie."
• On why she wouldn't pose for Playboy: "I don't care how much money they gave me. ... No one should be able to see my cash and prizes for $5, OK?"
What your favorite NBA team says about you, from SportsPickle.com:
"Oklahoma City Thunder: You honestly had no idea other sports existed beyond college football and high-school football pre-2008.
"Portland Trail Blazers: You don't mind never winning anything because parades and confetti are bad for the environment.
"Dallas Mavericks: The only countries you like are Texas and Germany."
NFL commissioner Roger Goodell nearly tripled his salary — from $11.6 million to $29.5 million — in just one year.
And you thought Adrian Peterson doubling his rushing total after ACL surgery was impressive.
Talking the talk
• Mike Bianchi of The Orlando (Fla.) Sentinel, on the Orlando version of the updated Monopoly board game: "Violators no longer go directly to jail; they go directly to a Magic-Bobcats game."
• Steve Schrader of the Detroit Free Press, on Michael Jordan turning 50: "AARP Jordan."
• Greg Cote of The Miami Herald, on this year's Daytona 500: "Gentlemen of the media, start your Danica Patrick search engines!"
Not par for the course
Greenskeepers in Purcell, Okla., discovered a meth lab inside a port-a-potty in the middle of the course, Oklahoma City's KFOR-TV reported.
Health officials immediately declared the can an unplayable high.
Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or firstname.lastname@example.org