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Updated Tuesday, December 25, 2012 at 08:01 PM

The Big East wins the "Culinary Conference" award

By Dwight Perry
The Seattle Times

So is it the Big East — or the Big Eats?

"The 13-school football configuration sounds more like a road trip on Food Network's 'Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives,' " wrote Chris Dufresne of the Los Angeles Times.

"Memphis (barbecue).

"Cincinnati (chili spaghetti).

"Tulane (jambalaya).

"San Diego State (fish tacos).

"Temple (cheese steak)."

NHL headlines

• At SportsPickle.com: "Gary Bettman visits children's hospital, tells everyone Santa isn't real."

• At Fark.com: "Toronto Maple Leafs' undefeated season remains intact through Jan. 14."

Maim that tune

Seven swans a-swimming, OK.

Six geese a-laying, Fine.

But five NBA games? C'mon.

Penalty on the play

Virginia Tech defensive back Antone Exum used the $470 Best Buy gift card he got from the Russell Athletic Bowl to buy holiday gifts for three youngters he met in the store.

Good for him but bad for the kids: The NCAA just declared them ineligible for the 2020 season.

0 for 400

The Dallas Cowboys are 0-4 when Tony Romo passes for 400-plus yards.

Envelope, please

HitFix.com is out with its list of the year's 10 worst movies, with "Piranha 3DD" edging out "Chernobyl Diaries" for No. 1.

Somehow failing to make the cut: the game film of the Cardinals' 58-0 loss to the Seahawks.

Face the music

So, how did acquiring Tim Tebow to push Mark Sanchez work out for the Jets?

"If you seek to inspire the San Francisco Philharmonic to a higher level," wrote Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle, "you don't try to scare 'em by bringing in a hot kazoo player."

Talking the talk

• Saints coach Joe Vitt, to AP, on the NFL schedule messing up any Thanksgiving or Christmas plans: "So I'll look forward to Easter in the springtime and, I guess, Arbor Day. That's the nature of our business."

• Kent Somers of AZcentral.com, pinpointing the Detroit Lions' woes this season: "They've had trouble starting games and finishing them."

• 49ers coach Jim Harbaugh, to AP, after his first-place team's 42-13 loss to the Seahawks: "I think we could have done better."

• Bruce Garrioch of the Ottawa Sun, on the perfect holiday gift for NHL commissioner Gary Bettman: "A Don Fehr dartboard in his office. The one he's using now is full of holes."

Gronk and grog

Q: Why is Rob Gronkowski so popular at the Patriots' New Year's Eve party?

A: He always spikes the punch.

Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or dperry@seattletimes.com


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